Film Review - Welcome Back

Sorry Bhai

Film: Welcome Back

Cast: Anil Kapoor, Nana Patekar, John Abraham,  Shruti Hassan

Directed by: Anees Bazmee

Duration: 2 hrs 27 mins

Rating:  * 1 / 2

Almost a decade after Welcome, which was no great shakes by any stretch of imagination but nevertheless was good enough for a few silly laughs, we have the sequel in the form of Welcome Back.  As the audience, we were surely much better off if they hadn’t come back. It is not worth a wada-pav, and a big ensemble cast has just been cobbled together to create some kind of chaos to pass off as a story.  This is sheer lazy writing that too at its worst.    

So the original story has been tweaked just a little bit here. The two buddies,  Uday Shetty (Nana Patekar) and Majnu (Anil Kapoor) have given up their erstwhile profession of bhaigiri and have settled in Dubai. There are more characters and complications here than the on-going Indrani saga. Maybe not quite, but you get the picture.  Dr. Gungroo (Pareh Rawal) discovers that he has a step-son (John Abraham, desperately in need of a crash course in acting) and on the other side of the planet, Uday discovers that he has a step sister (Shruti Hassan).  

The two friends meanwhile are on the radar of con women, one posing as a Maharani (Dimple Kapadia in an unworthy role) and the other a princess (Ankita Shrivastava, who needs to start with the ABC of acting) and both of them fall for the young lady. More chaos when a blind bad guy (Nasseurddin Shah) and his son (Shiney  Ahuja in a pink jacket) land on the scene.

One outlandish episode is followed by another and looks the dialogues were written with severe stress on the grey cells. “Jab maine chunaav me vote daala hi nahi toh mukhyamantri mera kaise ho gaya?” says Paresh Rawal trying to understand the existence of his step son. “Inke ghar mein ladies ke naam pe chipkali bhi nahi hain” whatever that is supposed to mean. 

It opens with a pixellated shot of Dubai and ends with climax that has some tacky CGI effects.  There is also a scene where a characters jumps from the one camels hump to another to save the don from a sandstorm.  Not sure whom we should feel sorry for, the camel or the audience who had to sit through this baloney. 

The acting is equally atrocious – Nana Patekar and Anil Kapoor manage to hold fort, but otherwise it is all downhill. 

The only relevant line in the film is where a character says – “Dimaag ki naas ko mat phaad” My sentiments exactly. 

 Published in The Navhind Times on 6th Sept. 2015
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Film Review - Dil Dhadakne Do

Cruise Control

Film: Dil Dhadakne Do

Cast: Anil Kapoor, Priyanka Chopra, Ranveer Singh, Shefali Shah

Directed by: Zoya Akhtar

Duration:  2 hrs 47 mins

Rating:  *  * 1 / 2

Dil Dhadakne Do is about a bunch of people who think they are going places but actually they are going nowhere and they all have some serious problems to boot. Of all places, the resolution incidentally happens on cruise ship during a holiday in the Mediterranean. That’s Zoya Akhtar’s ultra long Dil Dhadakne Do, a film that has a decent beginning and a redeeming end with a whole lot of nothing to fill up the spaces in between. 

We are introduced to the Mehra family with a voice over, that’s turns out to be of the family dog (Aamir Khan’s distinct voice). The patriarch Kamal Mehra (Anil Kapoor) is a rich self made tycoon and never misses a chance to remind everyone about that.  His wife Neelam (Shefali Shah) is not exactly suffering in silence, she makes her presence felt from time to time, but she is suffering all the same. Their son Kabir (Ranveer Singh) is still learning the ropes as far as managing their business is concerned, he has no knack for it, instead, he is interested in flying he family plane. At that point you very well know how his career is going to unfold. 

Their daughter Ayesha (Priyanka Chopra), now a successful businesswoman, was married off to Manav (Rahul Bose) who treats her marginally better than a doormat. Her erstwhile heartthrob Sunny (Farhan Akhtar) also lands on the scene and at that point, you know very well how this love story is going to unfold.  

Now the dysfunctional Mehra family is under huge debt and yet they plan this big celebration aboard a cruise liner because it is their 30^th wedding anniversary. They are also hoping to rope in some investors; their plan is to marry off their son to one of the rich businessman’s    daughter so that their company can be salvaged. If you think this “dosti ko rishtedari mein badalte hain” happened only in the 60’s and 70’s, then think again. 

It doesn’t take too long for the setting to be established but from there on, it doesn’t go anywhere. Well, physically it does, to many fancy places, including Istanbul targeting an audience that has aspirations. A serious amount of time is spent showing off all the locales while you wait patiently for the story to change gears. It doesn’t. 

It is only in the climax that it gets going, even if the proceedings are a bit illogical.

There are too many characters and you barely understand any of them. We get a glimpse of Ayesha and her mother, though the former is woman of resolve, the latter looks a bit confused. Kabir is more of a fun person who shares a chemistry with Farha (Anushka Sharma) but since other characters have to be accommodated, there isn’t enough screen time for him. 

Co-written by Reema Kagti (of Honeymoon Travels fame, another road movie about dysfunctional families, except that was in a bus this is a luxury ship) the screenplay not-so-cleverly makes way for what is coming up next. For instance, when Sunny’s name is mentioned you know Ayesha shares a past with him but yet that matter is delved upon till the cows come home.

The film touches upon patriarchy and women’s issues in a not so subtle manner - but at least it might make a point to a segment of the audience.  

On the acting front, Anil Kapoor and Shefali Shah play their parts with conviction; the latter in fact stands out among all the ladies in the film. Ranveer Singh has his moments and Priyanka Chopra is apt. 

Dil Dhadakne Do has the makings of a Bollywood blockbuster, big stars, exotic locales, romance, bit of humor - never mind if the story is a bit tedious and about an hour too long. 

When it comes to Zoya Akhtar, give me Luck By Chance, any day.  

Published in The Navhind Times, Goa on 7th June 2015

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